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Dealing with a Hospitalization for an ED During College
Warm, melted cheese. The crust, crispy on the outside and soft in the middle. I’d always loved pizza. But I couldn’t eat it. I. just. could. not. My chest was tight with anxiety. I still remember sweat dripping down my back as my family asked why I wasn’t eating what was one of my favorites.
Knowing I Had Anorexia
I’m not hungry, I said. I was starving.
I knew I had anorexia. I’d been to the library (pre-Google, guys). I learned anorexia’s symptoms and accepted that I had the illness, to which I was so helplessly naive. Yet, I had no idea an eating disorder was the vandal that would soon steal my hope, my future. And almost, my life.
This was 1994. I was 19 years old. (Do the math, I don’t care – I’m proud to be alive). Two years later I entered an inpatient treatment facility for eating disorders. Two months after that I was hospitalized and fed through a tube.
Applying for a Medical Leave of Absence
I had to apply for a Medical Leave of Absences (MLOA) from my university, which required letters written by me, my physician, and my primary therapist.
As numbers of college students struggling with depression, anxiety, and eating disorders escalate, some schools such as Georgetown University report increasing requests for MLOA.
MLOA policies differ from campus to campus, and there’s no streamlined process. Some schools make a MLOA easy on students and others don’t, according to lawsuits filed by students against their universities.
There’s a tremendous variation among colleges and universities and how they handle these situations, says Ira Burnim, legal director of the D.C. Bazelon Center for Mental Health Law. “Some do a really good job; some deal with it in just a frighteningly, appallingly prejudicial way.” [1]
School policies cannot treat mental-health leaves any differently than physical-health leaves as stated in the American with Disabilities Act, he said.
So it’s impossible to address school policies in many generalizations.
Average Medical Leave is Two Years
However, it seems the average length of time a student can take a MLOA is four consecutive semesters, so about two years. And some schools require students be stable for a substantial about of time, usually a few months, before returning to school. Documentation from treatment providers are required for students to return from a MLOA.
Students who take a MLOA do risk losing campus housing, as most cannot live on campus while on leave. Financial aid and scholarships may also be threatened by a MLOA, and students should check this before making a decision to stay or leave school.
Sometimes you don’t have a choice. Schools have the right to force an involuntary MLOA on students whose condition questions the safety of the student or the safety of others. While this is rare, it could apply in the case of someone with an eating disorder who refuses to get treatment.
Facing the Fear of Leaving
Regardless of logistics, leaving school is difficult, frightening even. It threatens and often changes plans you had. Altered is the schedule you’d mapped out of graduation, maybe grad school, getting a job, etc.
I felt like someone plucked my pawn off the game board, and everyone continued to play without me. Go to treatment without passing go. My friends continued going to class and parties, having fun, while I sat in a hospital bed, watching life happen outside my smudgy window.
And life was happening without me. I had to hit the pause button to get it together, before I lost my life altogether. Leaving school was painful but necessary.
I didn’t get back to school for a long time. I spent too many years bouncing from hospitals to treatment centers to a recovery that wobbled and then fell over. Back to hospitals, treatment centers, and that unstable recovery. Repeat.
And then I wobbled but didn’t fall down. My recovery became stable. I returned to school at age 25. I was that annoying old person in your class who actually liked being there. The one who asked the professor too many questions and carried that circa-1994 Jansport backpack.
I graduated summa cum laude. I don’t know who felt more proud: me or my mother who’d pushed me, supported me, screamed at me, loved me, and never gave up on me throughout the seven tumultuous years of anorexia.
Community Discussion – Share your thoughts here!
About the Author:
Leigh Bell holds a Bachelor of Arts in English with minors in Creative Writing and French from Loyola Marymount University in Los Angeles. She is a published author, journalist with 15 years of experience, and a recipient of the Rosalynn Carter Fellowship for Mental Health Journalism. Leigh is recovered from a near-fatal, decade-long battle with anorexia and the mother of three young, rambunctious children.
References:
- Newlon, C. (2013, November 6). Policies hamper students’ return from mental health leave. Retrieved August 16, 2015.
The opinions and views of our guest contributors are shared to provide a broad perspective of eating disorders. These are not necessarily the views of Eating Disorder Hope, but an effort to offer a discussion of various issues by different concerned individuals. We at Eating Disorder Hope understand that eating disorders result from a combination of environmental and genetic factors. If you or a loved one are suffering from an eating disorder, please know that there is hope for you, and seek immediate professional help.
Last Updated & Reviewed By: Jacquelyn Ekern, MS, LPC on August 28, 2015. Published on EatingDisorderHope.com
