Women of Substance
Currently seeking submittals of names of outstanding women and/or girls who exemplify substance, character and are shining examples of using their unique gifts and talents to lead fulfilling lives and contribute to a better world. May or may not have suffered from disordered eating. Contact Us
Dr. Wendy Oliver-Pyatt and Vicki Kroviak
Former college roommates Dr. Wendy Oliver-Pyatt and Vicki Kroviak are the cofounders of Oliver-Pyatt Centers, comprehensive programs for the treatment of eating disorders. Wendy, a board certified psychiatrist, founder of Center for Hope of the Sierras, and author of Fed Up! (McGraw-Hill) and Vicki, a television executive, both suffered from bulimia throughout their teen and young adult years.
How did you meet?
Vicki: We met in college. We were both volunteering at a student-run self-help center. Kind of ironic, when you figure that at the time that we were each completely consumed with our eating disorder. Yet, we were immediate soul-mates.
Wendy: Sometimes friends with food issues compete…You know, who can be the thinnest, the sickest, whatever. Fortunately, we were never like that. We tried to help each other get thin because we actually believed that thinness led to happiness. We really thought we were doing the right thing for ourselves and for each other.
Vicki: It's funny. I don't think either of us would have said “I have an eating disorder”. We were really just trying to be what we thought of as our best. We had what we were convinced were our “ideal” weights posted on the wall of our apartment as a daily reminder. We thought that we were being healthy, and sadly our society reinforced this idea.
Looking back, when did you start suffering from food and body preoccupation?
Wendy: I was really into ballet, which, combined with going through puberty, was a recipe for body issues. I began with food restriction, as most do, and the vicious cycle began. I didn't know it was an eating disorder. I wanted a lot out of life, I had a lot of expectations of myself, and I was convinced being thin was a part of that. I remember specific comments that influenced me. I convinced my mother to take me to a weight loss specialist, though I was at my natural body weight.
Vicki: My memories of dieting and food restriction in my home go back as far as I can remember. It was just the culture of our home. I can remember my grandmother, in her 80's, a wisp of a woman, telling me with pride how little she weighed. And my mother didn't know any other way. By the time I was in middle school I had full blown bulimia.
What about your recovery? How did that come about?
Vicki: For me, recovery came after I reached a point of total exhaustion. I was so tired of feeling consumed, that I got some help. And I was lucky enough to find a really good therapist when I did reach out. I also moved in with a friend who had a really positive, healthy relationship with food. It was the first time in my life that I lived with someone who was not eating disordered. I can still remember explaining to her, after we arrived back at our apartment late one night without having had dinner, that I couldn't eat because it was night time. She said, “Really? I just eat whenever I'm hungry.” I thought she was crazy.
Wendy: I visited Vicki for dinner one night after she had started on this new path. She made linguine and crème Brule. I was, like, what are you thinking?! I literally thought she was nuts… I was influenced by several authors, especially Geneen Roth. I started to see the light. I made the decision that I was unwilling to restrict, and I was willing to accept my body, even if my weight or size increased. I could not stand the idea of continuing to live in the prison of food and body preoccupation, I was exhausted. I slowly started a process of learning mindful eating. A deep realization for me was that I needed to take myself seriously on both an emotional and physical level. I started to grasp that my eating disorder had something to do with not treating myself with respect and honor, and there were reasons for this. I now always try to help my patients see how worthwhile they are, and I convey to them the feeling that I authentically respect them. I think that learning to take yourself seriously is key. Vicki was a big help to me. She used to remind me to stay gentle, something that our patients always need reminding about too.
You must have been kind of a rare breed, with your new way of thinking.
Wendy: It definitely is an internal shift when you learn to eat based on your own inner experience vs rules. This is not something we're encouraged to do in our society. Eating disorders do not occur in a vacuum. There are societal expectations, genetics, familial risk factors, and situations that hit us when we're most developmentally and psychologically vulnerable. It can be draining to live in a culture where everyone is talking about weight loss. In my personal life, I benefit from having family and friends who share many of my values, and that is helpful.
Vicki: I think that recovery from an eating disorder is really a journey, in the sense that at different times in my life, I have had to return to the lessons that helped me get well in the first place.
What makes Oliver-Pyatt Centers special to you?
Vicki: We've said since the beginning that our top priority is the client. Our guiding principle is we will do anything to help them get better. Also, it was really important to us to have a bilingual team. When I was living and working in Argentina, I surprised at the widespread incidence of eating disorders. This prompted us to make a bilingual treatment team a key part of the Miami Center. It is in a beautiful residential neighborhood in South Miami, a very tranquil place. But the setting allows clients to reintegrate into real life – at an appropriate stage in their recovery process, of course – through daily, guided outings into the community.
Wendy: We have made the decision that our treatment philosophy is to do whatever it takes to help an individual recover from an eating disorder. I want to provide an environment where patients immediately recognize that we take them seriously on every level. The environment, the quality, training, and cohesion of our staff, and the availability of clinicians and care providers on an individual level for each individual patient, is very important to a person with an eating disorder. In order to make good decisions in patient care, we must really authentically connect to and know each individual. This takes time and energy with each individual patient. We are willing to make this commitment to each person. We want to be a place where patients feel emotionally safe to share their true selves. We wanted a safe place that would allow our clients to reconnect with their true selves, yet also provide a kind of gateway back into regular life. To fully recover, at some point, you have to let the world back in. But it is important that patients have the chance to let the world in while they are still in treatment, so that we can comprehend their life experience, how it impacts them, and how they can approach and manage complicated situations that are a part of their everyday life. We believe that full recovery from eating disorders is possible when a person is provided with effective treatment.
What would you say to someone suffering from an eating disorder?
Wendy: You deserve the opportunity to recover. Your life and joy are being sapped. You didn't choose to be sick. You don't deserve an eating disorder. Recovery takes time, and energy. It is a healing process that sometimes feels mysterious. There will be bumps and setbacks. It is critical that you receive care from professionals that understand the biological and psychological components, with whom you can authentically connect.
Vicki: There's another way. It's not an easy way, it's not the way that everything in our culture will direct you towards, but it's a way. I look at my three daughters and the bombardment of messages that they receive on a daily basis about how they need to look and “be”, and it's a miracle that anyone survives adolescence without an eating disorder.
How has your sense of self changed over the years?
Wendy: I'm doing what I really love, not what I “should.” I'm passionate about women accepting themselves at all sizes and cultivating a strong voice to express themselves. In my adolescence and young adulthood, I felt intimidated about really speaking up and sharing my views and opinions. I now feel it is extremely important to state your opinions and feelings to others, allowing them to know your state, while accepting the outcomes. Sometimes others don't agree with us, and conflict can occur. That is OK too. Conflict allows us to know each other more fully. This can bring for greater closeness when we are willing to work things out on a deeper level. Sometimes, conflict can mean that we need to make decisions to change our expectations of others, or to move our energy in another direction as well.
Learning how to train and supervise an entire treatment staff, work with complicated family situations, engage with resistant or reluctant patients, all have been opportunities for me to evolve and to experience such incredible meaning in my life. I am sometimes surprised with my own growth. At the same time, it means so much to me when I see a woman learn to take herself seriously and hear about her life in a phone call or email after she goes home. When your patient goes from a state of joylessness, to a place where they feel their life is meaningful, and they respect themselves, it really is an indescribable experience for me.
Vicki: I think I spent years of my life completely defined by the scale. If someone asked me how I was, I might as well have answered with how much I weighed. My sense of well-being was so completely tied to that number. There was a time when I traveled with my scale in my suitcase, because God forbid that I should be forced to weigh myself on a different “less accurate” scale.
What do you admire about each other?
Vicki: I have complete trust in Wendy's ability to care for these patients, to connect with them, and to do whatever it takes to help them get well. I know that there will be no shortcuts. It makes me proud to be a part of what we're doing. That was part of our earliest conversations—that these programs would be excellent in every way.
Wendy: Vicki is a passionate person who loves to take on a challenging situation. She is a constantly growing person. I love how she is not afraid of facing problems or complicated situations. Having her as an integral part of my life and now of Oliver-Pyatt Centers, brings me joy, and gives me a feeling of being safe. I know that I can count on her through any potentially tough situation. At the same time, we have so much fun together too! Vicki is an extremely accepting and non-judgmental person. I think that going through an eating disorder does lead to this humility. She's driven but not at all impressed by titles or outward trappings of success. What she cares about is what is inside of each person.
How would you define success?
Vicki: A generation of girls who don't define themselves by our current cultural standards. More personally, to raise three girls whose measure of worth and identity is their own.
Wendy: There's a quotation on our website by Ralph Waldo Emerson that talks about adding a texture and depth to your life through what he calls “an advanced experience”. Success is a by-product of living life according to your values, interests, and convictions. I think that being in a place of gratitude brings with it acceptance. You can apply this to yourself, your body, your relationships, and even to life itself. I think that gratitude brings with it perspective. Sometimes, if things feel scary in life or I am unsure of how things will work out, I have to go to a place of gratitude. In our society, sometimes we come short on gratitude and perspective. Success has something also to do with having a sense of vitality and meaning in your life. To have this, one must take his or herself seriously.
www.oliverpyattcenters.com
Carolyn Costin
Carolyn Costin, MFT, recovered herself from anorexia, has specialized in the treatment of eating disorders and exercise addiction for thirty years. Carolyn is founder and director of The Eating Disorder Center of California and Monte Nido and Affiliates, which now has three unique residential centers in natural, home-like settings. Carolyn is a sought after speaker at national conferences and is known for engaging her audiences and giving hands-on skills. Carolyn's books, The Eating Disorder Source Book (2007), 100 Questions and Answers, About Eating Disorders (2007), and Your Dieting Daughter (1997), have helped professionals and the lay public in understanding, treating and preventing eating disorders.
Carolyn's struggle with an eating disorder started in the summer between her junior and senior years of high-school. A weight loss bet with her friend's father started her intense dieting process, and then triggered her tendencies toward perfectionism and compulsiveness. She won the bet, but kept on dieting. Carolyn lost about 50 pounds over the course of the following three years. It was 1975 and minimal information about eating disorders was available. In fact, Carolyn herself had never heard the words anorexia or bulimia. Finally, she realized in college that the “dieting” was in control of her and that she was no longer in control of it. Carolyn tried seeking help at her college counseling center, but the therapist had never seen or heard of an eating disorder. The therapist suggested she eat by herself if she felt uncomfortable eating around others! Sadly, Carolyn found this only exacerbated her problem. She had to struggle with her eating disorder alone and figure it out for herself, as so few resources were available at that time. Carolyn credits trying to understand her own battle with anorexia for developing much of her insight and success as a therapist. Carolyn believes people can become fully recovered; where food and weight take a proper perspective in the individual's life. She does not believe one has to deal with it forever, like the “once an alcoholic always one” addiction model.
After graduating college, she became a school teacher, and gained about 10 pounds. At this point in her recovery, she realized that there were two parts of her, the rational and educated side vs. the irrational, eating disordered side. A defining moment occurred while driving to a Christmas party, where Carolyn had promised herself she wound not eat any cookies at the party. But, the healthier side of her said, “You know, if you really want to show that you have will power, then go in and eat something, eat a cookie. That takes willpower.” Hence, she began differentiating her healthy self vs. her eating disordered self. She realized she was not going to want to gain weight or like it – as she tells others with anorexia to this day. Carolyn, at times, felt afraid when her weight went up, like she was losing herself. She knew inherently to argue with her eating disordered self when fears of weight gain came up. She also knew to take it slowly, and gave herself permission to adjust to the 10 pound weight gain for some time. She realized then and now that it cam be traumatizing to gain weight too quickly.
Carolyn continued to teach junior high and high school over the next eight years. She found the distraction of being involved in a career she loved and was devoted to, helpful in her recovery. Also, she found that falling in love and a relationship further helped her to recover. She still did not like her body more when she gained weight, but chose to accept this as part of her recovery process.
After her own struggle with an eating disorder, Carolyn decided to also work as a high school counselor. She went back to school and became a licensed therapist while continuing to teach. She left teaching in 1984 and went into private practice. She also ran a few hospital eating disorder treatment centers. Sometimes, she saw as many as 58 clients a week! She did this while also running two eating disorder support groups. She developed a wealth of knowledge and experience in treating eating disorders. Eventually, Carolyn decided she did not want to be in a hospital environment any longer. She wanted to offer treatment in a home-like setting. She had observed that individuals with eating disorders are often disconnected from soul and nature and thought a beautiful environment, in nature, along with cognitive behavior therapy, medication and group therapy would be an ideal treatment center. She then opened Monte Nido, which has been thriving for 12 yrs now, and also ran her private practice for an additional eight years. Recently, she opened Monte Nido Vista, a few miles away from the original Monte Nido, in order to accommodate the ever increasing waiting list to get into a Monte Nido program. Carolyn also opened The Eating Disorder Center of California in Brentwood California, where adolescents and adults, males and females, can get more intensive treatment than out patient therapy but not twenty-four hour care. The EDCC has been open approximately six years. She released two books in 1996 and opened Monte Nido. In 2006, Carolyn opened Rain Rock, a treatment center for eating disorders in Oregon.
Carolyn now spends her time directing her eating disorder treatment centers, speaking and contributing to multiple organization and conferences that support eating disorder treatment and prevention. She is a board member of the International Association of Eating Disorder Professionals, a board member of Dads and Daughter and a fellow of the Academy of Eating Disorders. Her recently updated and rewritten book, The Eating Disorders Source book and her book 100 Questions and Answers about Eating Disorders can both be found in bookstores nationally.
Jenni Schaefer
Jenni Schaefer works internationally as a speaker and writer to educate about eating disorders and to provide hope that recovery is possible. After struggling for more than twenty years with food and body image issues, Jenni is fully recovered from anorexia and bulimia. Her life is now devoted to helping all individuals touched by the illness. Her groundbreaking book, Life Without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too (McGraw-Hill), introduces a therapeutic technique that has changed the way people view eating disorders:
In the introduction of Life Without Ed, Jenni writes:
"I have never been married, but I am happily divorced. Ed and I lived together for more than twenty years. He was abusive, controlling and never hesitated to tell me what he thought, how I was doing it wrong, and what I should be doing instead... Ed is not a high school sweetheart. Ed is not some creep that I started dating in college... Ed's name comes from the initials E.D. — as in eating disorder.
Ed is my eating disorder.”
Based on the approach of psychotherapist, Thom Rutledge, Jenni treated her eating disorder as a relationship rather than an illness. She learned to think of her eating disorder as a distinct being with unique thoughts and a personality separate from her own. This therapeutic technique is now widely used across the globe.
Jenni is invited to speak internationally at conferences, schools, and other events. A singer/songwriter living in Nashville, TN, she uses music in her outreach efforts. She also incorporates humor into her work as a speaker and writer. Even though the topic of eating disorders is very serious, she finds that humor provides a hopeful light and adds a fresh perspective. Her ability to integrate spirituality into the treatment of eating disorders also makes Jenni's work refreshing, innovative, and lifesaving.
A consultant with Center for Change in Orem, Utah, Jenni is a contributing author to Chicken Soup for the Recovering Soul and its companion Chicken Soup for the Recovering Soul: Daily Inspirations (HCI Books). She is a regular guest on national radio and television, including Dr. Phil and Entertainment Tonight. Her work has been recognized in the Chicago Tribune, Cosmopolitan, Shape, The Washington Post, Woman's World, and more. She writes regularly for nationwide publications.
Jenni has inspired countless women and men to respect their bodies, believe in themselves, and join in the battle against eating disorders. Dove's® Self-Esteem Global Ambassador, Jess Weiner, honored Jenni as a Featured Actionist for her dedication to promoting eating disorder awareness. Jenni serves on the Board of the Eating Disorders Coalition of Tennessee and is a member of the International Association of Eating Disorders Professionals and Academy for Eating Disorders. She was recently named to the Ambassador Council of the National Eating Disorders Association.
Today Jenni is working on a second book (McGraw-Hill) to further the cause. She has even teamed up with jewelry designer, Sue Gillerlain, to create a jewelry line dedicated to increasing eating disorder awareness. Jenni's mission is to raise the divorce rate in this country (from Ed, of course).
For more information: www.lifewithouted.com.
Christine Hartline
Christine Hartline, MA is a recovering anorexic and bulimic who has been working in the field of eating disorder treatment for over 12 years. She is dedicated to educating others about the consequences, treatment and prevention of eating disorders. She is the founder of the Eating Disorder Referral and Information Center at Edreferral.com. She is also an ANAD Resource person who can help assist in locating FREE support groups in your area. Christine is an advocate for mental health parity and increasing research to help understand the etiology of eating disorders. Eating disorders are complex and involved complex interactions of psychological, biological, sociological, and interpersonal factors and do require professional assistance. Further, eating disorders and body hatred impact the lives of millions of men and women. Eating disorders are gripping and life-threatening. If you or someone you love is suffering from an eating disorder please seek information and assistance. For more information on the treatment and prevention of eating disorders please fee free to contact Christine at the International Eating Disorder Referral Center.
Christine Hartline, MA has been working in the field of eating disorders for over 10 years. She is a member of the Academy for Eating Disorders, Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, Eating Disorder Awareness and Prevention and the Bulimia Anorexia Nervosa Association. She has served as the administrator of the Monte Nido Treatment Center in Malibu, CA. She has also been a consultant for several eating disorder programs, a community liaison, a support group leader, a mental health provider and a utilization review coordinator. She is an advocate for the treatment and prevention of eating disorders.
Dying to Fit In- Literally!
By Christine Hartline, MA
Today in America you can be whatever you want to be - any dream can be accomplished as long as you pursue it. We have economic security and we live in a peaceful and prosperous nation! We live in the land of opportunity, rich with culture and diversity, the land of the free! The question I pose is - "is America the land of the free, especially for women?" With all the freedom and prosperity we enjoy women still remain prisoners. "Prisoners", you ask, what do you mean? Women are enslaved to a beauty myth, chained to the false belief that our value is based on our appearance alone.
In the United States approximately 10% of girls and women (numbering up to 10 million) are suffering from diagnosed eating disorders. Of these at least 50,000 will die as a direct result! Recent data reported by the American Psychiatric Association suggests that of all psychiatric disorders, the greatest excess of patient mortality due to natural and unnatural causes is associated with eating disorders and substance abuse. How did this problem reach such epidemic proportions? Why are we dieting ourselves to death, literally dying to fit in? When did we become so ashamed of our bodies, when did we learn to hate them so much? While eating disorders claim lives and significantly impact the health and well being of sufferers, as we investigate further an even more disturbing picture emerges. An amazing 80% of women are dissatisfied with their appearance. These numbers are staggering! Surely they cannot be correct! How and why could we have learned such contempt for our bodies and ourselves?
Eating disorders are complex and understanding their etiology requires complex interventions by professionals. In this article I want to examine eating disorders in the context of the questions I posed above. Why are women attacking their bodies? Where did we learn that our self worth is measured by external factors - by numbers on a scale? The answer lies in constant, subtle attacks on our bodies. These attacks wear us down, shake our confidence and esteem. We loose our sense of self, individuality and fall victim to narrow definitions of beauty defined by the media. The media acts as a propaganda machine determined to shake our confidence, remind us we aren't good enough, we haven't made it, that we just simply do not measure up. In a recent poll by People magazine 80% of women reported that the images of women of TV and in movies, fashion magazines ad advertising make them feel insecure about their looks. In addition, the poll indicated that women are made to feel so insecure that they are willing to try diets that pose health risks (34%), go "under the knife" (34%) and 93% indicated they had made various and repeated attempts to lose weight to measure up to the images. Why is the media bent on making us feel so down about ourselves? Why do they go to such lengths to make us feel "less than?" The answer is quite simple - pure economics. The media machine is economically driven as billions are spent on items such as cosmetics, new diets and clothes. This "beautifying" empire is dependent on our disempowerment. They count on us buying into their myths and misrepresentations: "we will never fit it, we can never be happy, thus we can never end the pursuit." Alas, the pursuit is endless, the products are endless, the damage to our self-esteem is endless, and the body hatred created is devastating. The assault is unrelenting! The images everywhere! How could it all happen, right under our noses? It is a subtle, continuous bombardment of images of beauty, images defined by profiteers, images that are not real, not authentic, and not attainable. The impact that these images have on women is profound. The financial, social and psychological and physical damages of a woman's lifetime pursuit of thinness are impossible to measure. Depression, despair, depletion of self-esteem, the withering and wasting away of physical, psychological and financial resources are unbelievable. How can we begin to make changes? How can we assess our damage report? We must all take a personal inventory of how our lives have been impacted by these images and how we have fallen victim to these lies and misrepresentations of beauty. By examining how these images have impacted your life you are better equip to avoid falling victim to these myths. You will learn to measure yourself by intrinsic qualities that are of far greater value and are far more beautiful than any image manufactured on a movie screen.
I was a victim of these attacks on esteem, on women's power, on our self-worth. I was a prisoner and almost a casualty of this war. If I did not wake-up and take a personal inventory and examine my value system I could have easily sunken into the prison of repeat diets, repeat failure and lifelong contempt for my body. As a prisoner I had to ask myself some tough questions: when did I start to hate my body so much? When did I begin to measure my self-worth by numbers on a scale? When did I fall prey to the idea that beauty is external and success is measured by factors that have little to do with personal strength and spirit? We must be aware of the images presented to us and unmask these images for what they truly are - destructive, superficial and unattainable images. These images do not value our uniqueness, they do not honor our wisdom and our spirit, and they do not measure us. We must reclaim and redefine our bodies as ours. They are miraculous, we all know this! Our bodies perform wonderful feats every day. We are physiological and biological masterpieces. Our bodies are not our enemies - they put us in motion, they create and sustain life. The functions our bodies perform for us are too numerous and varied to list. Vow that you will not longer fall victim to these images and help those around you to the road of self-love and acceptance. Advocate for freedom from body hatred and fight the billion dollar advertising, cosmetic, diet, entertainment and fashion industries - let's stand up for ourselves, our values, our bodies, our lives. We must challenge ourselves, our culture and our children. The stakes are too high to back down. Lives are lost each year as beautiful, healthy young women starve themselves to death. Millions of us are suffering from depression and anxiety as we are bombarded with images of our "faults." It is time to change, change begins from within and radiates out- let's begin.
The consequences of body hatred and the serious issue of eating disorders are far to significant and far reaching to be addressed simply by pointing the finger at the media machine. Eating disorders are complex and involved complex interactions of psychological, biological, sociological, and interpersonal factors and do require professional assistance. Further, eating disorders and body hatred impact the lives of millions of men and women. It is not only women that buy into these myths and it is not only women that suffer with these illnesses. Eating disorders are gripping and life-threatening. If you or someone you love is suffering from an eating disorder please seek information and assistance.
www.edreferral.com
Melanie Aldis
Defining Me
My name is Melanie Aldis, and I am one of the Regional Directors of Business Development at Center for Change. Are you wondering why someone who works in Marketing is writing an article? Am I qualified?
Well, I am also recovered from an eating disorder. I had an eating disorder for ten years, from the age of thirteen to twenty-three. I am now twenty nine years old. Unfortunately, I don't have much memory of those ten years, only bits and pieces. What I do remember is that I felt inadequate at a very young age. I never felt like I was the skinniest, prettiest, smartest or most popular, I thought I was just plain old average or less than and that wasn't good enough for me. I don't remember how or when my eating disorder started, but I know that underneath it all I had pure self hatred. Eventually my eating disorder became my entire identity and that is when my process of self discovery came to a halt. I thought, as author of Life Without Ed, Jenni Schaefer, would put it, that “Ed” would help me find the answer to true happiness and success in life. As you all know, the excitement and glamour of the eating disorder does not last forever. My life was consumed with food, insecurities and my outward appearance. While other kids were learning what their favorite sports or colors were, I had my head in a toilet.
After ten years of slow suicide, my esophagus was eroding; I had heart burn all the time and my heart would randomly beat irregularly throughout the day. What kind of existence is that? I discovered that I wasn't invincible and that if I didn't do something, I was going to die. I wasn't ready to leave this world. I didn't know what my purpose in life was, but for some reason I knew I had to keep holding on. I was finally ready to fully commit to recovering from my eating disorder.
After ten years, my relationships with my boyfriend, friends and family had deteriorated. At this point, I could not stop on my own, but I knew that didn't make me a failure. What I needed was to be in an environment that could save me from myself. I needed to be surrounded by people who cared about my life because I didn't. I checked myself into an inpatient facility. During that time, I was the “perfect” patient. I was an inspiration to all and the one who would reach out and become a role model for the other patients. At the same time, I was screaming and yelling at my mother in the middle of the night telling her that they were the enemy and that I was just trying to survive their evil plan to make me “fat”. Not surprisingly, I ended up signing myself out after 30 days. At the time, I thought that I was the expert in what I should weigh, and that they were just out to turn me into a hideous beast. When I got out, I thought that those 30 days had reversed the 10 torturous years with an eating disorder. It hadn't. I thought that my little time of freedom from “Ed” gave me another identity, which I defined as “perfect recovery.” The thing is perfection never lasts. I have now learned I am imperfectly perfect and that is what makes me Melanie Aldis.
Does this story sound devastating or what? Guess what. It isn't. I am a smart, funny, beautiful successful woman who has fully recovered from an eating disorder. I am now a representative of one of the most incredible programs I have ever seen. I work for them not because I need this job but because I chose a passion in life instead of choosing to die.
When I was really sick, I was inspired to keep hanging on because I knew that I never wanted another girl to go through what I had been through. I didn't want anyone to experience the feeling of loneliness and helplessness because it is terrifying. Knowing this is what kept me going through my very long and challenging recovery process. My ultimate dream was to help others who were living through what I had lived. After really, really, really, really hard work on myself (and I mean every really), I now have the opportunity to work in this healing profession.
I thank God everyday for letting me be a part of something so pure and sincere. I hope that people struggling with eating disorders have a reliable and caring person or people in their lives to hold on to their desire to live until they can do it themselves. I was lucky enough to have that, but I don't believe that is the only way out. If you are currently struggling with an eating disorder, look within your heart to find out why you haven't let “Ed” completely take over. There is a reason. Want to know what it is…you do want to live and you DESERVE to live, so hold on to those little daily miracles that keep you alive and use it as inspiration to reach out for help. I know you feel alone and scared, but I promise the moment you ask for help something beautiful will happen.
With love from my heart and my soul,
Melanie Aldis
Melanie Aldis is a clinical outreach representative with Center for Change in Orem, Utah. For more information, please visit www.centerforchange.com.

|
|